Two Of Celtic-Cyber-Timdoms Main Men Have A Protest In The Car Park 

All, LoTWites should be 'up' for Super Saturday. According to the press it will be a day for wearing kilts and getting your face painted as we watch Andy Murray get beat, again, from Rafal Nadal and watch George Burley's get the first part of his P45 as The Scots swelter and melt to a meek defeat in Macedonia.

LoTW is really worried that 5 Celtic players will be in that starting line up. The goat called scape, which comes out after every Scotland defeat will comedown hard on Caldwell, McManus, Brown, Hartley and Robson. So much so, that the clamour for the 'New Hutton' Kirk Broadfoot to be included against Iceland, after 1 decent game in 18 months, will reach biblical proportions.

Anyway, for once this summer it looks like Celticcybertimdom is in agreement. The feeling of being cheated coupled with the humilation of last Sunday, have The Huns released a DVD yet?, have meant that protests in the car park seem not to far away.

The 'USSM' seems to have been found out as a man of spin, smoke and mirrors while the spinners of these monnbeams, called 'moonbeamers' have went into hiding with no arguments of stats to back up the boards signing policy, or lack of one, this summer.

A thread on KDS informed, well researched by HMW Tim, that Celtic's wage bill dwarfs The Huns and it is probably at it's highest level for years, maybe ever. Have we now reached the same stage as we did under Saint Martin Of O'Neill when the footballing side is bursting at the financial seams loaded with average players earning above average wages?

Seems to be the case as 'Heid Porno Lackie' David Sullivan stated during the week, that if 'The Chief Executive Of Bobo Balde' comes to an agreement with Celtic, i.e. one that see's 'The Chief Executive Of Bobo Balde' already vast pension being made even vaster by another million or so, then he may still sign for The Brum.

The USSM has already paid off one on the biggest mistakes in the clubs history this summer. Thomas Gravesan was given the largest contract since Paul Lamberts agent retired to Monaco on his 15% and cost us a Shaun Maloney or a Pavlyuchenko left gonad to get him out of it. If the wage structure is creaking under the weight of these wallets then pay off's should have been factored in this summer.

Only Evander Sno, whose transfer fee we used to buy Shaun Maloney, and Derek Riordon, who left for Hibs in a deal worth £500,000 less than Lancashire giants Burnley offered a few months back, were the 1st teamers that left along with 'The Grav'. Not big earners both of them.

On the surface it seems that we are struggling to keep the costs down and this has had a detrimental effect on the signings we have made. The squad needed to be improved and trimed at the same time but this hasn't been done.

It's a longway to January.

Enough, of this bollocks. It was turning into CQNlite there. Let's get back to what this blog is unfamed for. Yes, bolloxs and sarcasim.

First to to poke his large heid over the trenches, after The Huns defeat was Gary Caldwell. He mumbled something about being 'Champions' and showing 'last year we are strong enough to do it, that we can do it and we will do it again this year.' before being replaced by Mick...

....who mumbled something about being 'Champions' and 'We showed our character and resilience last year and we have to do that again.'.....next up was Skippy McDonald.....yes, you guessed it said  “We showed true strength last time around, a real determination to win.”

Yawn......

I did like what Skippy surmised though....

“Sunday was tough because the result was a big blow. You can argue about who feels it worse, the supporter or player, but I would say the players take it harder."

I heard a 'fan' on the way out on Sunday say he was embarressed to be a Celtic fan. I'm never embarressed to be a Celtic fan but I have always hoped the players, when they produce terrible performances, are embarressed to call themselves Celtic players.

Seemingly, there was a Monday morning inquest for the players after that defeat, an inquest where all the players were probably told what to say to the press, see above. Our manager said quite worryingly..

"Sometimes players don't even know where they have gone wrong so that's what we did on Monday. We pointed stuff out and we kept it in-house."

...so the players don't know being 2nd best, losing 4 goals and being humped at home by Kenny Miller, Kirk Broadfoot, the worse fullback in Scotland, and Nacho Novo (Ratboy, who lives.........in a house somewhere in Scotland) is wrong then we really have a problem.

To the real deal. We have been drawn with Livingston in the Co-op Cup, a trophy that could be the best chance for us to win something this season. In truth, we should just use the Arsenal blueprint for this trophy. Lets play the youngsters and tell them no matter how far we get or who we get they will still keep their place in the team.

So that will be going out on pens to Livingstone then.

Forza

 Celtic's Title Hopes Head Clydewards

It's a sad day when the biggest cheer from the home support is when Daniel 'Thuglife' Coosans was sent off for his 150th offence. The light at the end of the tunnel was in fact a train coming the other way as Jan Vennegoor- here as known as fannybaws- got sent off for a stupid kick out at Kirk Broadfoot who is the worse full back in Scotland.

Yes, after Celtic's 4-2 defeat from average R*ngers on Sunday it felt like you had been booted in the baws and the sleepless night that followed was spent worrying about how unsurprised I was at the inept performance, another to add to the list of inept performances under our manager, and also that maybe we just watched our title hopes slow marched over the river to the tune of the last post.

The day started off great. Beachballs, flying lilos and passports but it ended with the revenge of Kenny Miller who usually, and won't for a few months, threaten any bovine animals with a banjo. I hated the fact that we thought he was worth booing. He has proved to be unworthy of air as he would sell his granny for £20,000 a week and he is not bothered who he looks uncomfortable playing for. He will score in Scotlands forthcoming defeats then not score again until March.

LoTW was sitting wondering why we were 4-1 down when a fellow LoTWite said

"Disappointing eh?"

"That's a fucking understatement" I guffawed.

So, what caused that "understatement"..

The Holy Goalie once again sold another game against them. He was at fault for 3 of the goals and dispite his podgy frame was the shadow of his former self on Sunday. He quite rightly 'got it tight' from Scotlands Shame' but if he dishes it out he has to take it. He is now big enough to take it.

The 'Ballad of Lee Naylor' was so tuneful after Sundays game. The non-performance of Andy Hinkel and the foolishness of playing a right footed player at LB, which along with Boruc cost us the game, makes us thankful that Joe Doumbe will soon be leaving the Big Brother House. With no SPL or Championship LB deciding to grace us with their not so graceful game, we have to make do with the pig ears we have.

'Heid and Hoof' had not too bad games despite getting a beasting from a thug in blue. Still losing 4 goals at home means that they have to be held cupable to some degree. Hanging maybe?

The midfield turned up and didn't do much. Paul Hartley, was on the park and went about his job but was faced with better performers on the day while Scott Brown continued his threatening behaviour, which may turn into a performance one day. Barry Robson came on and done nothing much. But he must be wondering how Scott Brown continues to get a game before him and Marc Crosas must go to sleep having nightmares that he has ended up at Celtic.

Another 'Glesga Derby' bypassed Nakamura like the M74 and Aiden McGeady will have to get his arse out of Kirk Broadfoot's pocket, he is still the worst full back in Scotland despite him having his best game for eons, before we play next. 

Up front, Shaun Maloney flitted in and out the game while Georgios Samaras now cemented his place as the 1st choice striker with his 3rd goal in 2 games and his hold up play was better than it has been. Ben Hutchison came on looking unfit and ballooned a late chance into the Jock Stein Stand.

We had too many passengers on the day. Too many players just turned up and went through the motions and our manager one again proved that when the chips are down he can't or doesn't have the guts to change it. As I said earlier, I fully expect other inept performances this season when our 'right good players' go missing. Our manager has to find the solution to this problem. Hell, he has only had 3 years to find it.

Sunday is just a blip in the bigger picture.

LoTW wasn't expecting us to sign the earth. In fact, I laughed out loud when I read the 'Moonbeams' of Pavlyuchenko and Darren Bent. The long ball game that we partook in with Tamas and Basa didn't annoy me as I understood that we had to get value for money and that the Mr 15% were chancers but I trusted the SSM.

How wrong was LoTW. The SSM should have a new moniker. The USSM. The Un-Sharp Suited Man as this transfer window he has either not done his job correctly- signing quality players at a reasonable rate and getting rid of deadwood- or he has been let down badly by the moneymen- whose aim is just to stay just ahead of The Huns and make up numbers in the Champions League- and has been trying to do deals with one hand tied behind his back and using marked cards when he sat round the table.

Whatever we deserve answers but we won't get answers as we are only the customers.

Last week, when paired against Man Utd, Villarreal and AaB, the USSM said

"Time is now against us but you never know what can happen in the last two or three days of the window. Our mission is to strengthen so let's wait and see what we can do."

I reckoned that running around in the last few days of the window for any sort of player is something I hoped we wouldn't be doing, if we were even looking, which I don't think we were. The article states that we spent nearly £7m quid this summer....I think it's closer to just over £5m and  as for strengthen......

Our signings this summer are Paddy McCourt for £250,000, now i don't reckon we will see Paddy until he rolls out for Hibs in 18 months time. Next up was Georgios Samaras, a player we knew about 3 seasons ago (before we signed Jan Vennegoor) and who we had on loan last season. £1.2m secured his services when we realised that 1) He was cheap 2) He was cheap and no-one else was as cheap.

Then came Marc Crossas, a player that we signed via a DVD, another scoop for our scouting system, from Barca for £450,000. Up next was Glenn Loovens for £2.5 who was scouted extensively for 2 games in the Algrave, after The Huns pointed us in his direction and  Tamas/Basa said they wanted to much money, cocaine or a bookies account.

Finally came Shaun Maloney, a player we sold then chased for 18 months to bring him back. We brought him back for around a £1m. I make that £5.35m approx. And for that money we only have one player that improves the first team right away.

Not one of them a left back...not even a 'Ballad of Lee Naylor' type left back.

The manager was more telling regarding the summer inactivity he said..

"Things have not materialised the way we would have liked."

..with that he either means the players he targeted didn't want to come or he didn't have the money to buy these players unless he sold players to fund moves. The saga of Bobo Balde proves, to me, he needed Balde of the wage bill to get players in.

Then this story appears regarding Jan Vennegor. We were willing to sell one of our big game players and not give us time to buy a replacement. Was Vennegor the big wage casualty since Bobo wasn't going anywhere? Some assest management that. Sell a first teamer because a reserve wouldn't move.

This summer has been the most disappointing since Seville. We have not added to the quality of the first team, we have not got rid of the squad players and deadwood and dispite being in a position of power we have failed to bury The Huns of the park.

Day's like Sunday, watching the blight on society celebrate, could become more common if the management don't get it right from now on in.

Ah, but feck it.....lets hang on the phone for 40mins for our Champions League package like the lemmings we are. By tomorrow I'm sure I will think Mark Wilson will do at LB....

Forza